Will Power.

I have none.

This morning Steve and I slept in late, walked down to Pike St. Market to get some breakfasts. The wait was too long at Cafe Campagne so we ended up going to Le Panier to peruse the pastries and grab a coffee instead. Prime example of a lack of will power- Meghann thinks, "gee, do I want a savory pastry or a sweet pastry??? Oh my goodness there are a million choices! Oh my goodness what if I want a whole loaf of brioche instead?? Wahhh!" Ultimate decision- I ate two pastries, one savory and one sweet (a mushroom one and a raspberry jam one to be exact).

Did I need two oh so buttery pastries? The answer is no one needs two pastries in one morning. Bah!

Example two.

Meghann goes to Nordstrom to look for shoes to go with this: oh so adorable dress she bought for Shirlae's wedding.

http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/2974055/0~2376776~2374327~2374331~6014133?mediumthumbnail=Y&origin=category&searchtype=&pbo=6014133&P=2

Steve to Meghann "Didn't you buy like three dresses for the various weddings last summer?" Meghann can't find shoes, but then sees a perfect bag, of which she cannot find a picture of on the internet. Meghann has been punishing herself for losing a kenneth cole bag she bought in San Francisco by leaving it at the semi-sketchy hotel she stayed in. She owned that bag for three days total before losing it. Her self-inflicted punishment has been to not allow herself to buy a new bag until the fall because she was so careless and should learn to take better care of things lest she take anything for granted.

Obviously you know that in the end i bought the bag. So much for saving up for my bulldog friend.

Ever since my promotion I've been spending money like I have no responsibilities in life. Food, shows, clothes, shoes, boozes. I'm starting to feel the guilt, and feel a little bit reckless and afraid of screwing up by not be able to say no to myself.
ACK!

This little blog is totally pointless I know, but I just need to slow down a little and get back to the center. I know "wah wah wah" it's a selfish little rant. Part of it is that I don't want to buy a car - so no savings toward that. I get to go to grad school for free because of my job - no savings for that. I lack foresight and want to live in the now, saving up for babies is not even something I can fathom yet. I guess if I was a little wiser I'd save for travel, but I guess my frustration is that Steve and I are never able to get enough time off to take a nice vacation, also all of our vacation hours are gobbled up by family events, weddings, etc. I guess the responsible thing to do would be to return the bag... At least I don't have astronomical credit debt, but damn I suck at saving.

The End.