The year of 2011

Oh dear friends and internet wasteland, I've been neglectful of this outlet. I return to this page every other month or so to re-read my own posts and to wrap myself in the memories, however, it has occurred to me that I've been rereading the same material over and over the past two years and not really getting any further in life from it. Time to officially move forward.

Cheesy as it sounds, last year was the year for nostalgia and for reflecting on my 25 years. Marrying Steve, not such a difficult thing, as you may well know. Being married? Quite mind blowing really. Oh to read those blog entries in the single years - yes, I found my old xanga, and gawd how I love reading those old posts, ah the old boyfriends, and the college, and the silly verbal crutches.. most of which I've retained.

What does 19 year old Meggie have in common with 25 year old Meggie? Well, quite a bit, she could still list her "expertise" as "indulgence," but never would you find the 25 yr old Meggie drinking till midnight then going to the library until 4 a.m. How the fuck did I even begin to DO that? My life was certainly a practice in extremes. I guess, as maybe I tried to express in those vows I choked out between my tears, Steve has brought balance (sanity) to my life.

That being said, the sub-topic of this post is that same evil beast that is the spine and sinew of any of my blog entries, insomnia.

Oh insomnia, you plagued me in my youth, propelled me in the college years, and spared me in the wedding planning phase, but here you are again. This time it's quite terrible, because no longer am I able to bounce back after four hours of sleep - I truly need those 8 or 9 hours. Generally I force myself into my bed and lie there, slamming the eyelids shut, cycling through my practiced attempts to trick my brain. Count down from 100, think of breathing, envision a black space, envision a peaceful space, think of the ocean, think of everything in life you are grateful for, think of a white space, think of a blue space, open eyes and stare at the texture of the ceiling. So tonight I give in, like the old times, I put the Classic Arts Showcase on the tv, drink some tea, and dig deep (SO DEEP) for this blog post.

Well, there I got distracted by a documentary about Elaine Paige. She might be my most favorite, so brash, dramatic, and loud. Might have to rent Sunset Boulevard this weekend :)

Ok, as per usual, not much substance in this post, but I hope it's the lead in to a renewed habit of life logging.

The Wedding Recap

Here it is: the wedding photo recap with some notation.

I mostly want to get these moments all out so that I don't forget them! Note: no professional photos yet, so I scalped all these photos from friends' facebook albums ;)

Getting ready in the Cheng's master bathroom with all of my ladies and of course Will my hair stylist. We listened to Department of Eagles - In Ear Park in entirety, and covered every surface in hair spray.
So much dress! Had a ridiculously delightful ride over the 520 bridge with my ladies, sipped on Sofia canned champagnes, tried to breath.
Arrived at the park feeling excited and slightly overwhelmed by how amazing things were already turning out. It was seriously the most beautiful day in September of 2010.
Right before we walked out my dad gave me hug and said "don't try to hold it in, let yourself feel these emotions - you can cry" and so I did aaallll the way down the aisle. Words cannot describe that intense emotion of walking into dappled light shining through rainbow balloons toward the most important person in your life, surrounded by everyone you love. Also note the "No Camping" sign.
Everything I could have dreamed of times one million bajillion. Walked down the aisle to Joanna Newsom's En Gallop (which our awesome harpist learned for us!), Steve's uncle Godfrey was our officiant, Maddie did a reading, Mark read a silly poem, Steve's mom sang a Chinese art song, we read our own vows, cried, and were married.
Officially Cheiler.
Post ceremony moment.

Reception at Pravda, which my lovely Murray Monster decorated to a T, she totally saved my wedding. Our custom made pie bar people!
Pies made by friends and family!

The tables! My mom had a crazy idea to make 150 jars of jam one week before the wedding - they turned out amazing. My mom is crazy.
Tables shot #2 - our table numbers were black and white wood block prints of animals.
Our photo monitor wall rotated photos from our rehearsal dinner slide show.
OMG FOOD. Seriously delicious food from Lisa Dupar Catering - we had red kuri squash gnocchi, a buckwheat salad with fresh mozzarella/artichoke hearts/caper berries, an autumn salad with mixed greens/hazelnuts/pears/bluecheese, green beans, ginger braised pork over bok choy, and skirt steak with mushrooms.
High fives at the Hippo Table.
Serious dancing, Steve and I were both sweating up a storm. I'm sure our pro photographer was dismayed and worried about how to make these people appear attractive...
So many friends traveled to be there, we were super thrilled.
My ladies. So pertty.
The very end of the night, after two solid hours of dancing we finished with a late night snack of curly fries served in cones and two hours of karaoke.

Alright, those are clearly not all of the memories, but it's a start. It was seriously the happiest day of my life, I could not have wished for more.

Wedding barf. Here it COOOOOMES!

My very first wedding inspiration board!

Our success in booking Meridian Park for the ceremony has re-inspired me to get planning again!

More to come (whether you want it or not, ha!)

Food for brains

Well gee. I'm 24 now. I'm here, as I likely was a year ago, sitting crosslegged on my gray felt couch, wearing my slightly bent and crooked kate spade librarian glasses, hair pulled back in the most unflattering of ways into a messy bun on the very top of my head (pebbles and bam bam style). My cat is flipping out because she needs attention, dashing back and forth from the front and back of the house (I say house because it's a nicer word than condo). Neil Young is whining about old men and the night is sparkly. Steve is out at practice with Miss A's band so I have a nice quiet night to myself. We had a rather nice meal at Annapurna for dinner, I had a bit of food envy because Steve is more adventurous than I and went for a delicious Nepalese dish while I stood by my regular old order of mutter paneer. His was delightfully tasty and filled with cauliflower, tomatoes, peas, and tons of spices. Mine was a bit bland.

I did a bit of planning for the trip, I'm excited to eat Indonesian food and dutch pancakes while in Amsterdam and giant plates of seafood served with a whole lemon in Dubrovnik.

My birthday was quite lovely, I threw a rather large barbecue at Steve's parents' house on the water. I was really happy to see so many of my friends in one place and was shocked at the turn out. With my paper crown and plenty o red wine I was truly the bday queen. The next day Steve surprised me with dinner reservations at Olivar, which is a delightful little restaurant on Roy in Capitol Hill across the street from the Harvard Exit theater. We had a starter of watermelon salad with a soft cow cheese, hot peppers, cucumber, and pumpkin seeds, this was a really great and very simple dish that was crisp, cool, and spicy that I may try to re-create for myself in the future. The second dish of scallops, corn salsa, and romesco sauce was equally great. Unfortunately the meal ended on a bit of a lame note with giant dry meatballs in an oddly sweet tomato jam and gnocchi that led me to believe someone had pushed the 'mute' button on my taste buds. The service, however, was superb and we were really pleased to find that most of their bottles of wine were under $30. It was a lovely warm summer night to stumble home down the hill together, drunk off an entire bottle of a spanish red wine.

23, you were alright. I stayed in one place and did the same thing for an entire year, which is a bit momentous. Still love my crayon colored capitol hill nest, still love my super geeky desk job.

I leave for Europe Tuesday! Woooooooooooooooooooo!

Life updates

So it's been a great deal of time since I've posted anything at all on this site. I've certainly thought about it, even drafted up some posts, but nothing seemed to be of any worth so I left things blank.

I spent my day slowly cleaning my place and doing all of our laundry. My cleaning soundtrack consists of Jon Brion, Jon Nakamatsu's Chopin Selected Works, and a new one, Peter Broderick's "Music for Falling From Trees." I'm feeling more than a little burnt out lately and find I can cry at the drop of a hat. Oddly not tears of frustration. I've been more than a little morose lately, and I'm somewhat consumed with thoughts of losing loved ones. I've been a little overzealous in reading everything I can get my eyes on detailing the crash of Air France Flight 447. It's all I can think about when I let my mind wander and all I can think of is how horrible a way to go it would be. I think I need to re-read Don Delillo's White Noise to get myself to see how ridiculous I am in fixating so much on death. At least laundry is one of my most favorite chores.

On an entirely different note, please if you have not done so already, go see Up. It's beautiful and magical and everything you could ever ask a movie to be. We went last night with a group of friends and I found myself crying within the first ten minutes of the movie. And not the usual one or two drops of tears that are usually drawn at the end of a good movie. I was audibly sobbing at one point and kind of embarrassed. I might actually do the unthinkable and pay my $10 again to see it a second time in theaters.

I head to Europe soon. I'm not sure how to feel about that yet, I still feel like I'm unorganized, yet have done everything I can possibly think of to prepare. I'm very intimidated by the idea of traveling alone, but I think this will be a growing experience for me. The longest Steve and I have been apart from each other in the past three years is one week while he was at the organic farm learning the ways of the land. I find myself feeling more than a little sad when he's at work or goes out late at night and I'm a little annoyed at myself for feeling so clingy. Luckily he is not annoyed, but I need to do something on my own to re-gain a little balance. Luckily my friend Jessica, who I am traveling with, is in a quite similar position with her boyfriend so we'll be helping each other get back on track a little.

I think part of the reason why I've been unable to post anything of worth on this site is because I'm no longer writing papers. Blogging was always a way for me to warm up for the real deal, also a very effective tool of procrastination. My life has become a bit formulaic lately, but oddly I'm not unhappy about that. I go to work, I come home, either Steve is working late and I cook myself pasta or stir fry, watch a movie or read a book, go to bed. If Steve is not working late we'll go for a walk, cook together, maybe grab a drink with friends. I go to his gigs about once every other week. I see friends a decent amount to grab a drink or a coffee. Life is just flowing. I know I'll tire of this flow soon and will need a new project or challenge, but honestly there are a ton of unfinished projects and challenges that I'm simply avoiding. Namely my artwork which I keep forcing myself to work at and hating everything that I come up with. I'm definitely in a period of stunted creativity. Hopefully I'll come back from vacation recharged.

I just finished reading Murakami's Norweigen Wood. While a fast and engaging read I didn't really love it. The sex was kind of awkwardly overt in a way that seemed too trying on his part and I didn't really fall in love with any of the characters. I guess I just never really connected with the book. I am glad that I read it though, I know that he had aimed to write a simple and purely plot driven novel and it was a great book to have on hand while waiting for the bus. I think I'm due a re-read of Wind Up Bird. I'm kind of searching for the book that will get me through my 15 hour flights and coming up short. I've been in a bit of a 'book rut' in the sense that I've been reading Nabokov, Murakami, Nabokov, Murakami. I actually have about 15 books I've purchased over the past three months and have only read one of them (Junot Diaz's Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao - read it, you must!) the rest have collected dust...

This post is a wonky beast.

Because it's fun...

This week was New York Fashion week, and since I sit at a computer all day I couldn't help but browse the various collections and read the blogs during my breaks.... I've decided to just link to all of my fav looks for the hell of it.

I present to you the "If Meghann Made Tons of Cash and Lost 40 lbs Fall Collection"

Stunning floral floaty Zac Posen dress
I would wear this with leather sandals though

Amazing vibrant yellow puffy skirt by Oscar de la Renta

Meghann would cut out the weird hat and booties, but this dress is deeeeelightful

Hmm i'm seeing a pattern (pun, tee hee) in my choices, but this Anna Sui colorful dress is lovely

I loove the yummy and simple the layers in this Diane Von Furstenberg ensemble

More vibrant yellow

ooooh, and this soft gray and white polkadotted Jason Wu gown

And I'd totally rock the leather gloves with this Marc Jacobs look, but I think I'd have big curly hair.

And pretty much the entire Marchesa line, but most especially this, this, and oooh this.

Some days just call for a velvet cut out dress.

And I'll wear my little dresses with this lovely Michael Kors camel hair coat (umm short sleeved coat? really? Soo pretty....So senseless)

Coat, dress, and yes, the hat. Magic.

What does my collection say about me? Feminine, possibly too much pattern, rarely edgy, loves color.

warmth

My new etsy vintage red candelabra in action! We chose light blue candles to avoid an overly christmasy feel. I'm really happy!
This second shot is just me trying to get the space needle and the candles in the frame.

Since my addiction to apartmenttherapy does not seem to have any signs of letting up, i've just been feeding the monster. We installed our new hanging plant in the living room last night (once some cleaning has happened I'll post a few pics) and now big plans are in the works for transforming the room of doom into a legitimate guest bedroom (no futon!!!). We're also in the works for building and framing a growing collection of art prints... We tend to gravitate toward bright colors and monster looking things so I'm interested/slightly worried about how it will all look when put together. I'll probably post our practice layouts once we reach that step and ask for advice.

Since the funding is limited we've also been focusing on eating at home every night (pretty successful so far) and drinking with our friends at home rather than going out. We'll be breaking this pattern Friday for Daron's bday dinner and karaoke extravaganza :)

Treats all around

So today ended up being a quite lovely Thursday. Here I sit on my gray felt couch (a button has worn through already, It's taking an emotional toll on me, much like that first scratch on a pair of shoes). I guess Steve and I shouldn't have such fat butts. Anyway, here I sit, with - no, not wine- french press coffee tonight. Cat is in window, as she should be. Steve's mama had his violin restrung last week so now I must be supportive and listen to him learn how to play again. He sounds, by his own admittance, like a 5th grade Chinese boy. Not the child prodigy kind. I'm not gonna lie, it kinda hurts my ears and I hope we are not pissing off the neighbors.

Anyway, today, I accomplished not a damn thing at work. I really did try, but all I really did was clean out my desk, arrange my post its prettily on my desk, consolidated piles, emailed a few folks in a pestersome manner, then day dreamed. Ok, I did actually accomplish more than that, but it was a less productive day than usual. So I decided today was a good day to go visit my ladies at Sugartown Vintage in Ballard where my arts are currently hanging out. So Steve picked me up from work and we headed our way. Went and chatted with Amy, picked out an awesome pair of vintage red pumps (twisty and peep toed). I casually looked at the awesome vintage dresses, but didn't actually try anything on. About once a year I give vintage shopping another shot - it always ends horrible and has me swearing off having breasts and eating cheese. What looks hip and irreverent on most girls, on me likely looks dumpy, or at best, like a costume.

On a side note, what's even worse is that I just found out that the owners of Anthropologie donate to anti-gay and pro-life initiatives. CRAP. That's the only place I've ever found that sells clothing that allows you to own breasts above a size C. I can't say I'll swear off Anthro, but I'm going to try harder to find local alternatives.... I've had no luck thus far though.

So, I'll be taking my artsies down this Sunday, they'll take a break for a bit. I might enlist some photog friends and their awesome cameras to help me photograph my artwork and maybe set up an etsy site. What I really need is an awesome website-y friend who wants to make me an awesome website for free or for art exchange.... Anywho, the show was a relative success. Sold three ladies:
This one to the lovely ladies who own Sugartown.
Then sold the upper painting to my good pal Elena, then the bottom one to the Grants who I love quite dearly. I'm happy to sell paintings to my friends because it allows me visiting rights.

So, we walked around Ballard, ran into one of two people we know who live in Ballard (Micah and Rodney the dog were hanging out outside their pad, taking a post-work day breather). After a week long romance with www.apartmenttherapy.com I had the craving to buy some house treats, but after 2/3 of the stores were closed, and the three things I considered buying were way out of my budget we kind of gave up. On the way back to the car though, we passed by Great Harvest Bread and remembered that at the end of the day they sell you two loaves for the price of one!!!!!!!!!! Buy one get one free local organic bread? What? That's Meghann heaven for you. So we dropped in, bought a sourdough loaf and a focaccia/cheese loaf and of course had our complimentary free slice of the bread of the day. We headed to PCC to pick up some more delicious real foods - which was also quite wallet damaging.

Once home Steve cooked up a really great meal of chicken thighs with oyster mushrooms, and leeks in a white wine sauce with a side of cous cous and brussel sprouts. We watched our shows which were hilariously delightful. I've been planning and plotting all week with little changes to make to our nest, and I finally bit the bullet and bought my very first etsy purchases. I will soon be the delightful owner of the following:

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=20510288

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=14920861

http://www.etsy.com/view_transaction.php?transaction_id=13660823

I am so excited to put these up in my home!

After my next paycheck I have my eye on the following:

http://www.urbanoutfitters.com/urban/catalog/productdetail.jsp?_dyncharset=ISO-8859-1&navAction=jump&id=13957824&search=true&isProduct=true&parentid=SEARCH+RESULTS&color=10

In yellow

and a print from this artist:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=20660658

I'm also in the market for a big jungle like hanging plant to hang from our ceiling above our two lamps in our living room. I'm hoping to find one on craigslist though - I have a hard time spending over $30 on a plant and I've yet to find a good healthy hanging plant under this price...

I'm going to be working very late nights next week, so at least I have something to look forward to next pay day!

Great, now i'm all coffee buzzed and it is most definitely my bedtime. I am going to go harass the cat, she looks way too peaceful.

Goodnight moon!

Work in Progress

I've been working on this pair for about three months now, but only seriously moved forward on it these last two days. I am quite fond of their little squirrel buddy (though his acorn could use a little work). I'm unsure if I should go a bit deeper on the blue in the background and am still not quite sure what the man should be wearing (need to look up some men's coats or something).

Any suggestions?

January 20, 2009

What an amazing day. I am truly proud of our country. What a speech.


P.S. I love all of the amazingly vibrant colored coats and men's scarves - and think it's appropriate that W and Laura wore black and gray... And can we talk about Aretha's hat?

absolute horror

So, today as Steve and I were having a 'cleaning party' which involved dancing around the house while cleaning to the soundtrack of Justin Timberlake's first album JUSTIFIED (believe you me, very dance inducing) when I realized I had not seen Inga in over an hour. Sooo I checked every room. No Inga. I called for her and Steve started looking for her as well. No Inga. We checked under every surface, in every corner, under each sink and in each cabinet. No Inga. I started flipping out. So we pulled out our fail safe move of putting food in her bowl and shaking it around (our kitty loves her food more than life itself) - No Inga. Steve realizes that he took the garbage out almost an hour ago and didn't fully close the door. I flipped. So we started looking around outside, calling, shaking her food bag, desperately quizzing our neighbors. No Inga. I start bawling, Steve stays totally calm. I went back inside for a bit, calling, looking everywhere we had previously looked and still no luck. I start giving up. We look outside, in the garage, all around and I start imagining horrifying scenes of finding my dead cat in our ally the next morning, I continue bawling. Steve keeps looking, I head inside, about an hour has passed.

I walk into the bedroom and there she is. Stooopid cat. Where the hell did you go?


















Yes, yes you should feel bad.

Boogers.

Are invading my brain.

Home Delights

Well, here I am, stuffed up, sore throat, stuck in bed with my tea and lap top. I have officially become re-inspired about sprucing up my home. We started planning the kitchen remodel about three months ago and got all the way to the sit down with a cabinet designer step... then just kinda quit. The holidays came up and we just kinda felt uninspired about the whole thing. Not sure how to put all of the pieces together, and believe it or not, it's rather difficult to find a design/color scheme to go with our screaming yellow walls (which I will not let go of).

Sooo in the last few days I've spent a rather disturbing amount of time on www.apartmenttherapy.com (thanks beth) and today there it was. The perfect kitchen.

We had already picked out a similar concrete style counter top made of recycled concrete and paper composite from Ecohaus, the one real difference will be that our cabinets are a darker espresso finish (to go with our mostly dark wood furniture and to avoid clashing with oh so light and yellowy floors). Now the challenge will be the find a match for this color in a green seal certified paint... It's on! We will also probably put a back splash of white sea-glass tile behind the stove... cause it gets icky back there.

So, since Steve had a rule of 3s, this will officially be our third color. We're going to get rid of the green in the kitchen and the guest bedroom and re-paint the guest bedroom walls in this same blue. I think it'll be a lovely addition and easy to work with..

Now if only I could work on my abilities to throw things away and organize.........

Meghann thinks....

Here I am, couch ridden yet again. I may be setting a personal record this year with the amount of times I've caught the cold of the month.

Luckily my new found hobby of embroidery goes well with my couch potato state. I've advanced fairly well if I say so myself and am pretty pleased at the results. My fingers are surprisingly sensitive to the touch right now from pulling and poking the needle around, perhaps I'll develop a bit of a needle callous?

I don't really know where to go from here with the whole embroidery thing. This lady was just supposed to be practice to get myself back in the swing of things, but now I quite like her and want to do something with this. It's too small and uneven of a scrap piece to make a pillow or anything out of her, so I guess she'll be a wall hanging, or maybe I can find a nice way to frame her. I want to hang her in my next show (December 13th, if all goes through).

So an update on the last show. Though Glo's was a super crap fest, I managed to sell a piece to a couple who saw it at Glo's.
Winter Surprise now belongs to a super attractive and friendly cap hill couple, and I, in turn, bought the following boots :)

http://www.anthropologie.com/anthro/catalog/productdetail.jsp?_dyncharset=ISO-8859-1&_dynSessConf=-2233397914460908676&id=840185&parentid=SB_BOOTS_FLATS&pushId=SB_BOOTS_FLATS&popId=SB_BOOTS&sortProperties=%2BmarketingPriority%2C-saleDate&navCount=32&navAction=poppushpush&fromCategoryPage=true&selectedProductSize=&selectedProductSize1=&color=cho&colorName=CHOCOLATE

So now my head is filled with ideas, and i'm sure that only a select few will be fully realized, i'm excited and inspired again. Steve and I have spent the last week drawing, playing music, cooking, and conspiring to take a stab at brewing our own beer and making home made pickles and quince preserves.

Some things that I've been rolling around in my head:

- an embroidered large throw pillow for my sister KP that will say "Poop" in fancy letters with birds and flowers... this will be her christmas present if I can actually pull it together

-putting together an etsy site for my artworks

-marie's painting - I've started it twice but am still not fully happy with the results

- a set of greeting cards for birthdays and the likes - maybe post cards

We'll see how long my fingers last under all this pressure. I hope I can at least eek out a few homemade christmas presents this year!

New Medium.

I used to embroider when I was young, but my mom was a bit of a perfectionist and under her tutelage I quickly grew tired of it.


Tonight I stopped by Stitches in Capitol Hill and picked up a hoop and some muslin. I thankfully never threw away my old sewing box (a heart shaped wicker atrocity from the earlier days of stitchery) so just a few new needles and I was ready to go.

I'm excited.

For the love of windy nights

I quite enjoy the wind. I sat inside nearly all day watching the one small tree outside my window flail about. The rain drops really make satisfying thuds on the front window when propelled by the wind. Once the rain had passed, I had really re-defined the meaning of lazy, having watched movies and tv all day and having not really moved from the couch with the exception of short jaunts to the kitchen eat more food (frozen soy chicken nuggets). At 4:30 I made the bold decision to leave the house. I went up to Broadway, bought two books from Bailey/Coy, got a delicious coffee at the new Vivace which is at the bottom of the new Brix development then headed to the Soap Box where I met up with Mark Gilzy. He's buds with the owner so we get free stuff all of the time. I was tempted into purchasing four bars of soap (actually 2 bars, since every sat is buy one get one free) my delights included 1 orange clove bar, 1 avocado clay bar, 1 salt water taffy peach bar, and 1 lemongrass bar. We chatted with a few other locals who had a rather well behaved and adorable brunette dachshund. People were remarkably friendly today on the Hill. Perhaps it's gentrification, or perhaps it's the fall, a friendly older gay couple and I chatted quite a bit at Vivace, and all of the patrons of the Soap Box (who all equally adore the owner Phil who is bursting with personality and seems to pride himself on knowing everyone's business) were particularly outgoing and friendly. Mark and I then walked over to Shinka Tea where I read my book while he worked and we both ate delicious chicken and mushroom hombao.

I am about to venture out into the night once more to get dinner and drinks with some folks. I'm not feeling entirely well (still have this damned chest cough), but I'm propelled by romantic notions of a lovely autumnal evening....

Pity Party

I want to stomp. Scream. Throw rocks through windows.

I think my artwork is cursed. I am taking a break from it all. I get an email from Glo's at 4 p.m. yesterday that says:

The owners decided to repaint the walls and no longer hang local artwork. They took down your stuff and a piece was broken. Please come pick up your things tomorrow at 7:30 a.m.

Awesome. Just so awesome.

So we went there this morning. Again, the lady who set the whole thing up did not show. The hipster bitch at the counter was... a bitch. No sympathy, no apologies for breaking my things and ending my showing 3 weeks early and giving me a one day notice. There were posters of Marilyn Monroe and the usual 50's bull on the walls. In approaching said bitch about compensation for my frame I was told "take it up with Cyra" (no show lady). I said hell no I was not making another trip and tracking down their flake of an art person. She asked how much I said 50. She said no way, and that they would only replace the glass on the visibly broken frame. I commented on the fact that they were ON THE FLOOR of the restaurant and had scratches that were never ever there. She said "are you REALLY going to re-frame that because of a few scratches??"

I am ready to admit I have anger issues sometimes.

This whole ordeal occurred in front of a bunch of older customers. I did NOT keep my voice down at this point. Forget about it. Forget Glo's. No longer will I wait an hour to eat their stupid food. No longer will I deal with the stupid hipster apathy that comes with the shitty coffee every 30 minutes while you wait an additional hour for the food. There are too many other places doing brunch these days to waste my time.

I feel embarrassed. I feel ashamed for letting myself get so worked up. I'm not a serious artist, I shouldn't expect to be taking seriously. I want to throw myself a giant pity party involving me, my bed, and a leather bound diary to write all of my feeeeeeeeeeeeeeelings in.

I think I have a problem

Disclaimer: this entry is devoid of intelligent subject matter. It may disgust you.

BEHOLD!

Today after a delightful feast of noodle soup AND dim sum delights, Miss Beth introduced me to a whole new world of shoe heaven. I had never been to DSW, nor even knew that there was such a place... I am now in trouble. At delightfully half-off prices I hope to never be foolish enough to spend over $100 on shoes again!

As you can see from the above evidence I have a problem with buying shoes - and that problem is saying no. After my impromptu shopping trip with Beth I decided to clean out my closet to make room for my (3!) lovely new pairs. In doing so Steve dared me to line them all up to prove how ridiculous I am... The above is the result - all shoes included with the exception of running shoes and flip flops. I am both embarrassed and delighted, for in doing so I discovered a few that had fallen into the depths of our closet.

The results also inspired me to do something that I never ever do.... take care of my shoes. I polished up my boots (which have seen far too many rough nights of drinking), cleaned up the stain on my grey suede peep toes, and put the first four shoes on the right in a bag by the front door so I would finally take them to get re-heeled (they've been pushed aside for over a year waiting for this treatment). And, after a long legacy of shoe deaths by water logging, I finally began the process of waterproofing my shoes.

Today's treats:

By far the most ridiculous of my shoe finds today, these shoes, in the words of Beth, were made for me. Of course they are perfect for Seattle fall weather with their fabric exterior, peep toe-ed ness and shiny pleather heel.... I suck.

These, while incredibly cute and comfortable, will probably not stand the test of a rain storm either. I love their yellow suede interior....

Now, these, these are a smart find. $30 bucks, comfortable, cute, actual traction on the bottom, and while they would probably drown in a puddle of any serious depth, they could at least keep my feet dry for at least as long as it would take to get home to change into those big blue rubber boots pictured above....

Now if only I could train my feet to never feel pain..........

and now my fingers are black....

New painting hooray! It's a bit of a color barf I know, but I had a lot of fun on this one. She is eating delicious buns of perhaps the dim sum variety :)

Will Power.

I have none.

This morning Steve and I slept in late, walked down to Pike St. Market to get some breakfasts. The wait was too long at Cafe Campagne so we ended up going to Le Panier to peruse the pastries and grab a coffee instead. Prime example of a lack of will power- Meghann thinks, "gee, do I want a savory pastry or a sweet pastry??? Oh my goodness there are a million choices! Oh my goodness what if I want a whole loaf of brioche instead?? Wahhh!" Ultimate decision- I ate two pastries, one savory and one sweet (a mushroom one and a raspberry jam one to be exact).

Did I need two oh so buttery pastries? The answer is no one needs two pastries in one morning. Bah!

Example two.

Meghann goes to Nordstrom to look for shoes to go with this: oh so adorable dress she bought for Shirlae's wedding.

http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/2974055/0~2376776~2374327~2374331~6014133?mediumthumbnail=Y&origin=category&searchtype=&pbo=6014133&P=2

Steve to Meghann "Didn't you buy like three dresses for the various weddings last summer?" Meghann can't find shoes, but then sees a perfect bag, of which she cannot find a picture of on the internet. Meghann has been punishing herself for losing a kenneth cole bag she bought in San Francisco by leaving it at the semi-sketchy hotel she stayed in. She owned that bag for three days total before losing it. Her self-inflicted punishment has been to not allow herself to buy a new bag until the fall because she was so careless and should learn to take better care of things lest she take anything for granted.

Obviously you know that in the end i bought the bag. So much for saving up for my bulldog friend.

Ever since my promotion I've been spending money like I have no responsibilities in life. Food, shows, clothes, shoes, boozes. I'm starting to feel the guilt, and feel a little bit reckless and afraid of screwing up by not be able to say no to myself.
ACK!

This little blog is totally pointless I know, but I just need to slow down a little and get back to the center. I know "wah wah wah" it's a selfish little rant. Part of it is that I don't want to buy a car - so no savings toward that. I get to go to grad school for free because of my job - no savings for that. I lack foresight and want to live in the now, saving up for babies is not even something I can fathom yet. I guess if I was a little wiser I'd save for travel, but I guess my frustration is that Steve and I are never able to get enough time off to take a nice vacation, also all of our vacation hours are gobbled up by family events, weddings, etc. I guess the responsible thing to do would be to return the bag... At least I don't have astronomical credit debt, but damn I suck at saving.

The End.